(via cleoselene)Source: passengersgazette
Every blue moon I end up killing a bug with some spray that isn’t intended to be an insect killer. Like if there’s a spider on the ceiling in the corner, and I spray that nigga with some Lemon Pledge. Some irrational part of my brain is like
“what if the Lemon Pledge mutates the spider to 30x its normal size instantaneously… has anyone soaked a spider in furniture polish before.. what am I about to do?”
But then the spider runs and dies a slow death.
Sometimes, I wish we would run into each other in real life.
and right there, in public, I would make the biggest scene. I would make people stop and stare and possibly call the cops due to my level of anger. We’d make the news. That is how big of a scene I would make.
but really, I hope we never see each other again.
never in a million years.
if I never saw your face or heard your name again? i would not be brokenhearted.
Dude these two eagles were fighting mid-air and got stuck. They crash landed at an airport and both survived.
How hardcore is that? Look at their faces tho.
Its like “I swear to GAWD Jerry”
(via stoleyourgirlfriendand)Source: bestrooftalkever